I am one of the biggest Mama Mia and Abba fans. Ever since I was little. I even had the kid group version on CD. I felt so honored to have it. I think I was born in the wrong era, but God knows what he’s doing.

The clothes I’m wearing today make me look like a character from The Babysitter’s Club. (One of my favorite series as a kid)

The wolf is my spirit guide. I truly believe it is symbolism of God being with me.

I have Dissociative Identity Disorder. Formally known as Multiple Personality Disorder.

I am bipolar.

I am manic depressive.

Anxiety riddled.

Nerve-twitching.

All of that fun stuff.

Plus side? It’s who I’ve become and I’m happy with me.

I am an alcoholic.

I am a sex addict.

I am bisexual.

I am a sinner.

I’ve watched a life pass before my eyes while holding my hand at 11:09am. That really set me on my straight and narrow, regardless the couple of hiccups. What happened was supposed to happen, all part of that plan.

I’m noticing things coming to fruition from a cultivated field that I dug up and have been emotionally, physically, and spiritually working through.

My prayer life is one hundred times better than what it has been.

I find pleasures in the simple things. Coffee. Candles. Music. Books. Journals. Pens. Sports. Animals. Love. Humility. Intelligence. Holy Spirit.

I secretly LOVE the beach, having lighter hair, and getting a base tan. Working on my body has really set me on a new path. I always wanted to seem like I had my shit together whilst I run across the sand, hot beneath my feet, and my new pup chasing after me. Little Morgan. I’m thinking little Ruxin. It’s such a toss-up.

I think I’m a hippy.

Make Love. Not War?

I am a water sign, Cancer.

I have an obsession with Mermaids I won’t experience because I’ve been afraid of being judged.

The Little Mermaid is truly my favorite Disney Princess Story.

I feel I am responsible for a group of people in my life and what I do will result in how their story continues to go.

“Don’t go wasting your emotions, lay all your love on me. Don’t go sharing your emotions, lay all your love on me.” -Abba (You know Abba means “Father.”)

Is it coincidence that I’m listening to Abba and the song “Lay All Your Love On Me” came on and then I started thinking. It feels like God is singing to me in this moment. Then I realized that ABBA means FATHER and is used in the BIBLE. Just saying.

“Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” -Mark 14:36 NIV

I’d love to move to Greece one day.

I keep having triggering thoughts and they take me right back to certain places right now. It’s not stopping. As I type all of this stuff out, memories just keep flooding forward and it’s getting to be a little much. I almost feel like I’m breaking down. My body keeps responding as if I’m in trouble. I think I might be stuck in flight or fight mode.

I hate when I get stuck like that. It’s like I can’t get the body to function and I hold my head in my hands and I think of what my next move is going to be.

Lord, show me the way.